Have you ever wondered, like most men out there, actually, most women too, as to what is it that women really want? If only we were to know the answer to this question, surely we’d have conquered at least half the universe! So here are my top three secrets to winning a woman’s heart.
Since you men are such visual creatures, by which I mean that men understand things that are in the form of a picture rather than a words, I’m going to use exactly that to explain my perspective on this. Sorry, I’m not going to give you any movie examples because my memory for names is crap. But you’ll remember the movies yourself well enough to relate to, even if you’re a mediocre Bollywood/Hollywood fan.
Secret #1. Rescue us!
Ask any girl what she’s looking for in a man, and she’ll say “ caring” amongst the top three. And we see that caring in how you take care of us and the situation in times of need.
Remember all those movies where the hero rescues the heroine from tigers, rapists, world destruction?
Yes, we do need men to play the knight in shining armour and us to be the damsel in distress who you rescue. It’s not that we can’t rescue ourselves. In reality, it’s the women who do almost all the ‘rescue’ work that needs to be done…it’s just that we want to feel loved and cared for enough, for you to make that effort. Plus, it’s a thrill for us to have a guy behave all protective!
Ok, back down feminist gals, I’m just saying it’s something most of us girls like, if you don’t, well, that’s you. And in today’s world, we may not need protection from wild animals ( from when we were cave dwellers) or scary goons (like the 80s Indian movies where the the girl is screaming Bachao! And Bhagwan ke liye chod do mujhe !) we do need someone to say, “ don’t worry, I’ll take care of it” or “I’ve got your back, babe”, when life overwhelms us. Maybe pick us up from the airport when we land late at night? Or take care of the car trouble that’s bothering us? Or just back us up when your mom is whinging us out? ( this last one for the married men there)
So wearing a shining armour and riding a white horse won’t win our hearts but looking out for us, definitely will!
Warning: getting into fights and arguments with random men for some perceived misconduct against us, is NOT manly. Just stupid.
Secret #2. Persistence pays
If you’ve seen the South Indian movies particularly, you’ll find a lot of them have the hero being incessantly persistent in his pursuit of the woman he likes. So yes, we women do like the attention you’re giving us and the guy who persists definitely has a higher chance of winning us rather than one who gives up easily. You do, of course , need to understand the fine line between being persistent and stalking/ harassment. If you don’t, then this will get you in a lot of trouble.
Persistence shows us that the guy is willing to go the length, is willing to bide his time, and considers us worth the wait. By putting us up above in his priority list, he sneaks into our priority list. So who do we think of calling when we’re bored? Or need to vent? Or someone to hang with when we’re at lose ends? Yes, him. We hugely appreciate a guy who’s really into us, and so he goes from being a nobody to being the significant other in our life! It also shows us that you’re man enough to really go for something you really want and are willing to put in the effort and time. Example of stalking, calling us 100 times a day and a bombardment of messages. Example of persistence, sending one message every two-three weeks simply to ask how we’re doing.
Remember, if she says ‘no’, you have to respect that and move on.
Secret #3 Have a sense of humour.
If you have the ability to laugh at yourself and make us laugh, it makes you a sure winner.
Why are romcoms way more popular than pure romance movies? Because we all like to laugh. Pure romance can get too cheesy and cliched but throw in humour and you have our heart. Think of all the great movies you watched, the Romcoms will stand out rather than the tragic love stories.
Life is serious business, something or the other is always going south. When you laugh and smile, we laugh and smile with you and your sense of humour makes us associate you with happiness and laughter. And that’s not someone we ever want to let go of.
Tease us, laugh with us, and give us a chance to laugh at you because you’re a funny guy. Humour keeps our interest levels high and our endorphins jumping. In fact, humour is as important as passion in a relationship, the foundation on which memorable love stories are made.
Remember though, finding a partner who shares your sense of humour is critical. If you find “ Kapil Sharma” hilarious and she’s into Ellen DeGeneres, you are not a good match.
So tally -ho my brave men, and go forth to conquer womanly hearts with your new found knowledge! (And watch this space for more secrets that women won’t tell you…. Shhh!)